I'm going to be honest- I'm competitive. And I think pinterest might just kill me.
At first pinterest and I had a fun relationship- recipes and fun diy tutorials, good ideas for home organization and decorating. I love that stuff. I'm a mom, and so I guess it's only natural that many of the pins I'm drawn to originate from the awesome mommy blogs. You know these blogs- these are the moms who can cook the most fabulous gluten free kid friendly meal in their perfectly pin-worthy home as their homeschooled kids create some awesome craft that corresponds perfectly to whatever holiday is approaching. As she waits for her husband to come home she might look out into her perfectly (diy) landscaped backyard that has just the right amount of funky and beautiful mason jars along with the most amazing herb garden ever and she'll pray one of the thirty-one things you ought to pray for your husband everyday. Maybe she'll put on the apron that she made last week, so she doesn't ruin the awesome shirt she just crafted from one of her husbands dress shirts.
I am not that mom.
Thankfully, I've never even met that mom. But somehow when I read these blogs I'm comparing myself to her. And I get a little bit worried about this impossible internet wonder woman that I'm now in competition with in my head.
I sound crazy, right? I do. I totally sound nutty. Please don't stop being my friend. I need friends.
Since we've already determined that I'm a kook, I'll just keep going and dig my hole a little deeper. I was thinking about this pinterest issue the other night and I think what's happening is that it's breeding discontentment with the life I have now as I pin and pin and pin away at my dream life. The small and cute birthday party I was thinking of having for my girls now needs to be pin-worthy. And when I say pin-worthy, I mean it would be featured in a magazine and professionally photographed (by me, of course.) It's not enough to sit and color with my kids- we need to be making our own gak and play dough. Even my clothes are affected! I don't think I've ever worn something that would be found on pinterest- I'm 5'3 and I have four kids. I don't have time to know how to knot my scarf 50 different ways. I'm doing good if the scarf is clean. I used to be okay with that stuff, but now it makes me feel guilty and lame.
I've crossed the line. And just now it's dawning on me: I need a reality check. I'm competing against fantasy land.
I'm a Christian. In the New Testament of the Bible, the Pharisees are not the good guys. Jesus is the good guy. Unfortunately, I usually relate most with the Pharisees. The Pharisees didn't recognize their imperfections and lameness- they were too busy being awesome and perfect. But it's our lameness and our imperfections that scream out for our need to rescued by Someone who has no lameness and no imperfections. That would be Jesus. I can remember hearing the story of the prodigal son as a kid and totally thinking that the older brother is justified in being all bummed out that his stupid prodigal brother gets a party for coming home after wrecking his life. Hello, the older brother represents the Pharisees in that story. The point is, we're all prodigals- not one of us is perfect. Not in our hearts, our thoughts, our homes, our clothes, our parenting, our cooking, our blogging, or relationships. And when we think we're living up to an impossible standard we can only be disappointed.
I know this is just about pinterest and me being crazy. But to the mommies, to my friends, to me- let's spur each other on in getting our Matthew 6:33 on. "But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you." And when we fall on our faces and suck at life, we can know that we're not alone. And we know it's okay because of who our Savior is, and we know we aren't forgiven and sanctified by our pin-worthy awesome lives.
I'm so quick to get caught up in my pride one minute, and then wrecked by envying someone else's achievements in the next. But when we're content because of who Jesus is and who we are in Him, we're free. (Galatians 5:22-26)
I'm free. And I'm so done competing with the fantasy land mom who lives at anthropologie.
Dude, I know this is a post about pride and all the related biblical issues you are focusing on, but don't forget that the reason you've never met this woman is because she doesn't exist! You could make a whole additional post about how when you pull off pinterest-worthy stuff, you feel guilty for editing out the stuff that didn't work! All the stuff you see is the best of the best, the creme de la creme, the 1% as it were, of pins. Pinterest survives on the repin-able stuff, mommy blogs survive on taking 100 photos and posting the one after the two year old has stopped crying because she can't eat cake yet and just before the dog jumps up on the table and eats it anyway (and that's never mentioned, of course). You post tons of photos that make you look like you have a pretty fun, great life, and its natural to be bummed to not feel that way all the time. So yes, do the work on making yourself feel grateful for what you have, but at the heart of it all remember its just a fantasy anyway.
ReplyDeletetotally! i love the internet and social media, but sometimes I feel like I'm so busy creating a fantasy-internet life that I forget about the normal real life. :) I need to be reminded that (duh) no one's perfect.
DeleteI love this post Keri! So many days I feel the same way with the image of "pefect mommies;" and Pinterest is all over that. How you wrote this, nailed it on the head, not only for you, but for most of us!
ReplyDeletethanks julie!
DeleteI could say so many things about this post but all I will say is AMEN!! and we are still friends ;) xoxo
ReplyDeleteHA!! good!!
DeleteKeri, can I just say that you "LOOK" like one of the coolest mommies I've ever met, and if I didn't read amazingly vulnerable posts like this, I would think you had it altogether, in that organic, holistic, naked baby way (which is totally awesome, IMHO)! Perfection is a total turnoff, be real or be gone, haha! Thanks for sharing this lovely blog, and being who you are! I love your darling family, and that you are REAL! Kali and Mia join me in sending kisses to the girls!
ReplyDeletethanks ruth! i'm just now starting to get how freeing and wonderful it is to just be real with myself and with others- especially in the whole mommy thing. sometimes it's just hard and it sucks. :) what a blessing we have in going through that stuff with each other!
DeleteThanks, Keri! Great reminder. It's crazy how easy it is for the devil to use things around us to make us feel like failures. I tell you via Instagram sometimes, but I think you are an amazing mom! I want to be your kid!!;)
ReplyDeleteaw, thanks cindy! i love your instagram encouragements because i almost always see them when my kids are trying to kill each other. :)
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